Inside my Head
by the-thirteenth-doctors
Summary: Alyssa saw her mother die after being possessed by a demon and called a number she never thought she'd need to ring again. Castiel picks up the phone and takes her to Sam and Dean, and though they've never met she knows everything about them...
1. Prologue

_(A/N) Hi guys! I'm Martha and I'd just like to give a bit of background info before we get started…  
1\. I may not be able to update too often because i. I'm a massive lazy ass and ii. My mum restricts my laptop and mobile use tons…  
2\. This is my first supernatural fanfiction and I'm only on season 6 so sorryyyyyy if I leave out some details or get them wrong please don't sue me I'm only human(ish)  
3\. I am British so if I say things like 'pavement' or 'autumn' that's why.  
(Self advertising) my Instagrams are .heroes and .cake_

 _On with the show!_

Prologue

The thing inside her mother advanced towards Alyssa, raising it's knife up high and bringing it down- not in to Alyssa's own heart but into the stomach of her mother.  
"Exorcisamus te!" her mother started to gag  
"Omnis immundus spiritus!" Alyssa squeezed her eyes shut  
"Omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursion  
Infernalis adversarii, omnis legio,  
Omnis congregatio et secta diabolica." She squinted at the smudged writing on the back of hand. The monster was starting to leave.  
"Ergo draco maledicte  
Et omnis legio diabolica  
Adjuramus te.  
Cessa decipere humanas creaturas,  
eisque aeternae Perditionis venenum propinare."  
It screamed as it streamed out of her mother before collapsing into a crumpled heap on the ground. The black smoke raced across the ground, and Alyssa knew her mother was dead. She was, in the most literal sense, an empty vessel.  
And though Alyssa knew she should be mourning, she knew she should cry and scream and flip tables or punch walls- she didn't. She pushed the sadness deep inside her, imagined locking it up in a steel safe and hurling it to the back of her mind.  
Taking her phone out of her pocket, she turned away from the bleeding corpse and pressed one contact she'd never thought she'd have to call. Calmly, she pushed the phone to her ear and spoke the second he picked up.  
"I believe you." Her whisper echoed around the silent living room as it grew into an ecstatic yell, "It's REAL!"


	2. Chapter 1

Sam threw the newspaper down in front of Dean, who was eagerly attacking a large cheeseburger.  
"Janine Edwards, apparent suicide, sulfur found around the room she died in."  
"Demon?" grinned Dean through a mouthful of food, "but it was gone?"  
"Yeah," replied Sam, "but this is the interesting bit," he sat down, "the doors were salted but the windows weren't, and I reckon the demon left because of an exorcism."  
"So a badly done job by someone who at least partially knows what they're doing" Dean shrugged.  
"I'm betting on the daughter," Sam got his phone out, "apparently Cas has met her before and to be honest, I can see why…" he trailed off and showed Dean a picture. It was of her bedroom, a simple room with a single bed and a large bookshelf next to the desk, which was as messy as the floor (very messy) and everything was painted a dark blue, almost black. Except you could barely see the walls because they were papered with drawings. Some were quick sketches, and others were full on canvas paintings. Some were rough charcoal line works, others were detailed pencil drawings. All were of Sam and Dean.

Alyssa sat silently on her bed, staring up at the slowly ticking clock, still in her mourning clothes. The funeral had been hard for her but she hadn't wavered in her stoic emotionlessness. Never letting her true feelings peek through the veil between herself and her sadness.  
To pass the time she grabbed the nearest piece of paper she had and a pencil that was about an inch long from so much overuse. Slowly, she shut her eyes as she let the small pain at the back of her head grow into a stabbing crescendo that overwhelmed her mind and with it came the small glimpse into someone else's life. She saw him lying on the floor in a pool of blood, alone in a darkened room. Then it was gone and with it the pain. Shaken and shivering she started to draw…

Later that day, she found herself serving tea to an angel awkwardly perked on the edge of her sofa. Not a situation everybody finds themselves in, but she was working with it. He didn't talk much, as she knew from last time, and he turned down the tea she offered him. He probably knew it was just to put off leaving; to be honest, she was nervous to be meeting the people she'd been dreaming about for the last year.  
"So." She said, "to be honest, I never thought I'd see you again."  
"It isn't a good thing." He muttered gruffly, looking anywhere but her.  
"Right, right," she said, "cause of the whole death and monster thing…" she trailed off, staring at her feet, and couldn't help but think of how tense and awkward it was. She sipped her tea.  
A minute went by  
"You are not upset?" he asked, "at your mother's death?"  
She inhaled sharply and waited a moment before replying; "Yes and… and no. Mostly no." He looked confused. She sighed and continued, "I'm mourning inside but I'm withholding a positive demeanour." She used her mum's phrase.  
"Oh." He replied and she hadn't expected anything else. Last time he'd only spoken to the bare minimum, so she could tell it was taking a lot of effort to hold up this conversation. All he'd done is explain why people had tried to kill her and why they had flipping terrifying black eyes, then he'd left.  
The silence continued to stretch between them, so she stood up and picked up the bag she'd filled with the things she'd thought she would need (it was surprisingly light).  
"Shall we go then?"


End file.
